Healing Dance with a Piano
I’m sitting at a piano feeling anxious, immobilized, indecisive and deeply sad. Why? What could a piano be doing that has me stopped in my tracks? Haven’t I been writing about how wonderful it is to be out hiking, even in deep snow at low temperatures. Haven’t I been making presentations about what I’m willing to do to be in the presence of overwhelming beauty? Didn’t I declare 10 months ago today that I was now a nomad?
It’s just a piano! I don’t have a house, I can’t have a piano, right? Well, that’s just it! This isn’t just any old piano, it’s the piano that I bought 30 years ago to lighten my heart. It’s where sang songs with my children. It’s the instrument that freed my inner musician while I mastered the first two books in the Suzuki School. It bonded me with my son as he blossomed as a cellist, giving voice to the duets we played together. It was an instrument of healing in the community Shepherd’s Play that softened my heart to forgiving the Waldorf Community for dashing my dream of taking a class through their 8-year schooling journey.
So, it’s not just a piano. Its strings are heartstrings. And now, as my son, who has been keeping the piano for the past 10 months, moves away to his own house-free living situation, it appears that the piano must move into its own new life.
The problem is that I don’t know who’s going to get it. I was so happy at first that my son would have it. Now, he can’t take it either and the piano’s unknown future leaves me sad and unfulfilled and grieving.
Stop! Whoosh! My story just changed in a flash!
I just received an email from someone I know and love who says she’ll take it, and thanks for the offer!
You know, I’m wondering if this is another one of my Radical Forgiveness miracles.
I was feeling really stuck. I surrendered to doing the Four Steps to Radical Forgiveness process:
First, Tell my Story – you can see that above
Second, Feel my Feelings – yep. That’s right there too.
Third, Be willing to see perfection in the situation by loving myself having the feelings and noticing that perhaps there’s a message in this situation about my journey into the nomadic lifestyle that I’ve chosen.
The fourth step – I choose Peace – happened before I even had time to elaborate on the first three! That email arrived while I was writing this post! A New Story, new possibility, a new perspective was already on its way. It’s true that I had written to the woman yesterday, when my mind had said, “You should find someone who will take the piano. You have to do it,” but my heart was not enrolled. I’m open to the idea that allowing myself to feel the feelings of sadness, and have those moments of emotion and heartfelt memories let the “piano energy” flow and allowed me to receive an offer for the piano.
Until now, even though I’ve been making offers and letting people know it’s available, no one has made an offer!
I’ll keep you posted on how the story unfolds!
For now, I’m celebrating this little miracle and rejoicing with my piano that it may have a new, heartwarming home!
In joy,
Regina
Do you want to have little miracles like this in your life? I love sharing these tools of Radical Forgiveness with people I love. I’ll be doing that in my upcoming Journey to YOUR HeartLand course, a four-week telecourse for courageous heartsingers who want to finally fulfill those dreams that have been eluding them. Check it out here:
Journey to YOUR HeartLand:STORIES