I met someone yesterday while on my walk who had an immediate response to my introduction as someone who teaches forgivness. “”What if I have someone I don’t ever want to forgive?”
My smug thought, before really knowing the story, was that Radical Forgiveness works for anything!
Can Unforgiveness serve us? Can it be better, safer, more effective to hate someone else who we blame for our suffering, or the suffering of others?
As we walked along on our nature walk, noticing trees, small animal holes in the pine needles, changing slope on the mountain, and multi-colored fungus adorning rotting logs, our observations of Nature were interspersed with the unfolding story. Bit by bit, the pain and suffering were revealed.
The consciously nurtured hatred of this man touched my heart. I was almost convinced that, indeed, here was justified, necessary unforgiveness. He needs that.
What woke me up, though, is the very reason that he says he’s maintaining hatred – for his children. Hatred protects them, he said. By practicing the art of discerning the truly bad people one can survive.
I was wondering, however, if it’s because of the children that we would want to forgive, so they don’t experience the anger, the separation, the hardness of hate.
We talked for a little longer before our paths diverged, I feeling honored that he would share his story, hoping that I had planted a seed of willingness to be open to the possibility that even this transgression happened for a spiritual purpose and healing. That seed may grow over time.
Later, I was listening to testimonies from graduates of the Living Foods Institute. http://www.livingfoodsinstitute.com . A lovely, healed woman tearfully proclaimed her experience of Forgiveness in the program. “In this week,” she related, “I learned that I could let go of the anger, the abuse that I had received and STOP it now. That my son, sitting over there, could now receive the LOVE that I have to give. I can stop the chain of generations of hatred. That’s what I got from this program” Applause and free flowing tears in the audience affirmed the power of her statement.
Unforgiveness and Forgiveness.
Where are they active in me?
Where are they active in you? Let me know!